> Grocery stores and other non-traditional meeting places, I personally avoided bothering women in, assuming there should be some neutral ground where a woman might wish to be left alone.
So many of the single women in my social circle complain they can never meet decent guys and would kill to be talked to be a decent, intelligent guy at the grocery store.
Worst-case scenario is a 15 second disturbance of minor flattery following by each of you carrying on with your day. Really, that's the worst case scenario. Really.
Maybe the disconnect between single men and women could be resolved by a survey that asks a random sampling of men and women when they think it would be appropriate to approach or be approached by a potential SO, and finding the discrepancies. For example, if it is found that most "decent" men think it's rude to approach a woman at location X, but most "decent" women would prefer to be approached at location X, the men could be told to change their behavior. Maybe someone can suggest this to OkCupid (if it hasn't already been done); it seems they do a lot of statistical research already.
> So many of the single women in my social circle complain they can never meet decent guys and would kill to be talked to be a decent, intelligent guy at the grocery store.
Tell them to take the initiative, then. Make eye contact, smile, and make a comment to start a conversation. Most women are far better at that than men, anyway, especially in a place like a grocery story where most of the time if a guy takes the initiative he comes off desperate.
I am guessing you haven't approached women much? Your "worst case scenario" only applies if they actually think you are a decent guy up to their standards. Otherwise they might be offended that you even dare to talk to them (best case scenario: they just pretend they didn't see or hear you).
Not that I advise against approaching women, just saying.
> I am guessing you haven't approached women much?
That's not really called for! The GP is right though; you're unlikely to be, say, given a slap or yelled at! This assumes, of course, your not being leery or crude and not asking them on a date straight off. etc. (where you will likely get a slap).
But there is nothing wrong with saying hi and having casual conversation with someone in the grocery store. 99 times out of 100 it will just fizzle out after a couple of seconds - one time in a hundred you might hit on a common interest and the rest, as they say, is history. I've met a number of great girlfriends in this way.
It's also a great way to get over shyness.
Also; you should talk to random people anyway. It brightens up their day and yours in a perfectly harmless way.
There is this social convention that we all must be silent and look dead ahead when queuing, for example. Everyone I know thinks it is silly but they don't want to be the first to broach the convention - just in case....
Didn't mean it in a nasty way. And yes, actual physical attacks are unlikely as a response. Unfriendliness is rather likely, though. But if you have a hardened "shell", no problem. Or if you have become very adept at chatting.
Also, if those single girls at grocery stores are so desperate, why don't they make a move themselves?
I'd say that is highly unlikely also. At worst you'll just get ignored :) but generally anyone will talk to you if you look and speak normal/friendly.
> Also, if those single girls at grocery stores are so desperate, why don't they make a move themselves?
Social convention. Also; this is the beginnings of a strawman because it's not like that at all :) the GP is just suggesting we talk to people more - which is always a good thing!
So many of the single women in my social circle complain they can never meet decent guys and would kill to be talked to be a decent, intelligent guy at the grocery store.
Worst-case scenario is a 15 second disturbance of minor flattery following by each of you carrying on with your day. Really, that's the worst case scenario. Really.