We plan to, but life worked out this way so far. We’re still in our early 30s, and having the financial capability to thrive with children is very recent. We’re both rapidly progressing our careers so it’s hard to find the right time to shift direction. We’ve been together for a decade but most of that decade has been grad school, paying off student debt, paying lots of rent on entry level salaries, and so on :)
Yep. It’s especially difficult for my wife. She finished grad school at 28, and her industry is almost entirely within high CoL cities. We had wanted kids by 30, but when 30 rolled around it was a pandemic and we were locked in a 1000sqft apartment with my mother in law, and my wife was still new in her career and worried that if she took a break from her career it would mean never going back to it.
We’re in a place now that we can actually plan it out but as you mention, our time is low on the children front. There’s just very few sweet spots between “full career” and “no career” for women in some fields, especially if your childbearing dream includes taking a year or two off work.
It can absolutely happen right away though - there’s no way to tell for sure until you try. Our kid #1 (both aged 33) was first month of trying, kid #2 (both aged 36) took 3 months.
Most of our friends took longer, but another same-age couple had a similar experience to us.
So go in with low expectations, but don’t try before you’re ready.
“Geriatric pregnancy” is a term that is sometimes used to describe a pregnancy in a woman 35 or older. It’s best, from a biological standpoint, for a woman to have all of her kids before age 35. I don’t think most people understand this or talk about it enough.
Counter opinion: I regret getting a dog. Bad timing. It was around the time my second child was born. We are not succeeding at giving him the attention he requires because obviously the kids are the priority. He demonstrates his dissatisfaction by pissing on the stairs every other day. Pity, since you can tell he's a cool dog, just frustrated.
One of the reasons I rushed to get a puppy when we realized we were at least 6+ months out from any pregnancy is because I want my puppy to be fully grown and calmed down by the time we need to pour all our attention onto a newborn.
Puppies are actually nuts and are very needy. If I get another dog it’ll probably be when my future human children get to school age
